Lies, Damned Lies, and Gun Statistics – Flopping Aces

“We Should Just Confiscate All the Guns Once and for All!”

Many of you may truly believe that. You may think that the Second Amendment is archaic, outdated, and totally pointless. However about half the country vehemently disagrees with you, and of them, a pretty large portion is fully willing to shoot somebody in defense of it. We’ve already covered how your partial bans are stupid and don’t do anything, so unless you are merely a hypocrite more interested in style than results, the only way to achieve your ultimate goal is to come and take our guns away.

So let’s talk about confiscation. This is the part where we delve into what the Second Amendment is really about.

In 2018 a U.S. congressman embarrassed himself on Twitter. Eric Swalwell (D-Calif.)—who is best known for his relationship with a Communist Chinese spy and farting on live TV—got into a debate about gun control, suggested a mandatory buyback (which is basically confiscation with a happy face sticker on it), and when someone told him that he would resist, he said resistance was futile because the government has nukes.

And everybody sane was like, Wait, what?

Of course the congressman backpedaled. You see, using nuclear weapons on American gun owners was an exaggeration, he just wanted to rhetorically demonstrate that the all-powerful federal government could crush us peasants like bugs (they hold our pathetic lives in their iron hand), and he’d never ever advocate for the use of nuclear weapons on American soil (that would be bad for the environment!), and instead he merely wants to send a SWAT team to your house to shoot you in the face if you don’t comply.